


Dysphoria for two

by Purplepizzarolls



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Bad Writing, How Do I Tag, M/M, Not Beta Read, Pregnancy, Trans Male Character, Trans Spencer Reid, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-01
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-14 06:00:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,162
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29787495
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Purplepizzarolls/pseuds/Purplepizzarolls
Summary: Spencer and Morgan make an important discovery one day
Relationships: Derek Morgan/Spencer Reid
Comments: 4
Kudos: 29





	1. Red lines

Spencer stood in the bathroom, looking at the stick that would determine his entire future. The nervousness was overwhelming and he was about to have a breakdown. 

Then the lines appeared. He saw two. the lines that determined his ENTIRE life. The ones that made people happy and others upset. 

"I-what?" He mumbled to himself. He couldn't believe what he was seeing. His brain was still processing it. 

He stood there, his response delayed. What was he gonna do? He just needs to tell someone. then his body finally moved

Spencer ran out of the bathroom and grabbed his phone, quickly dialing Morgan. 

As Morgan picked up, he didn't get a chance to say anything. "Morgan, come over, it's an emergency" he says quickly

"Why what's going on reid?" Morgan asked. He was just sitting at home at that moment but he was already putting on shoes because if someone says it's an emergency you usually have a very quick response even if its mental or physical 

"I'll tell you when you get here but just hurry" Spencer says, rushing his words, swallowing hard and trying not to sound too panicked

It took about 15 minutes for Morgan to get there but fuck it felt like an hour to Spencer. 

Every second that passed felt aching and Spencer kept pacing around the house. When Morgan got there, he opened the door and started sobbing right there 

"Woah, woah, Reid, baby, tell me what happened" Morgan says, hugging Reid and rubbing his back.

"Morgan I'm- I'm pregnant" he sobbed. "A-and- I have to stop taking my T and I- I'll have to tell hotch and hotch will make me not be able to-" Reid went off until Morgan finally interrupted 

"Its okay. I'm gonna be here and I'm not leaving. we don't have to tell the team but we have to tell hotch at least" Morgan says

"Why should I even tell hotch?" Spencer mumbled. "I mean, I think I'll be okay until about week 5. I mean- I could just tell him then."Spencer rushes himself to say that. He clearly didn't want to get restricted on anything. He was fine telling hotch but he wanted to do what he usually does

Morgan rubbed Spencer's back. "We can worry about telling hotch when it comes around. But for now, do you want the baby? I understand you might not want it and I am here for you either way" Morgan says, looking down at him 

"Morgan? What-what are you saying? Are you telling me that you don't want me to have it? I want it" he says, a little confused. Why wouldn't Morgan want the baby?

Morgan sighed. "Reid, I want the baby if you do." He says. Spencer sighed. 

"Look- I'm sorry. I'm gonna be a but- more emotional" Spencer mumbled. "Come on let's just- go inside and we'll talk about this more" 

Morgan nodded and Reid led him in. He closed the door and they sat down on the couch.

"Okay, Reid you gotta talk to me. What does this mean for us and what do you want to do with this info" Morgan says, taking Spencer's hands into his old and caressing the back of his hands with his own thumbs 

Spencer was thinking. For once he didn't know. He didn't know what to think. This was a big thing for him and to think of all the bad feelings he'll feel and then the responsibility. He's wanted kids since he was 18. Hell, he was hoping he could get a surrogate for Maeve when they were dating because he didn't like the thought of getting pregnant but here they were. 

"I- I don't know" he mumbled. 

"Well that's okay. We'll take this as slow as we can and we'll figure this out as we go" Morgan says with a smile.

"What will the team think? I haven't even come out to them yet. I'm not ready to tell them and-" Spencer was cut off

"Like I said baby boy, we'll figure it out as we go" Morgan said, kissing Spencer on the cheek


	2. Telling but the show is a crying act

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Man, everyone's tired

As two weeks passed, Spencer was exhausted from just running around and being pregnant. The team kept asking him if he was okay and he wasnt gonna just say that he was having a fucking baby.

They sat on the plane, coming back from one of the harder cases. Spencer tired of just being out but also because of hiding it. He was gonna tell hotch. It was something he just needed to do.

Morgan and Spencer were the only ones awake and the others were asleep as it was pretty late when they got on.

Spencer moved over to beside Morgan, looking at him. "I'm telling hotch" Spencer whispered to him and then leaned on Morgan's shoulder. "Alright, you do what you feel comfortable with baby boy" Morgan mumbled, tired as all fuck. 

Spencer then fell asleep on Morgan's shoulder and before they knew it, they had landed and Morgan was shaking him awake. 

As Spencer woke up, he was trying to figure out what the fuck was going on. He leaned up and looked at Morgan, rubbing his eyes. 

"What time is it?" He mumbled tiredly. He was tired and was trying to figure out what was going on. 

"Its- 3am or somewhere around there," Morgan says with a small yawn. 

Hotch was waiting for everyone to get off before he did. Jj was already off. 

About an hour later, Spencer and Morgan were standing in hotch's office. Spencer fidgeting with his own thumbs and the hem of his sleeve 

"So what is it you two?" Hotch asked, actually quite concerned. Not even hotch knew Spencer was ftm and that was what Spencer was scared of. 

"I- so, I missed my menstrual cycle and when that happened I got concerned so I took a test. I- it was positive" Spencer says, hoping hotch knew what he meant. "And I'm hoping you don't tell the team" he says, reaching for Morgan's hand

Morgan grabbed Spencer's hand. Hotch put the pieces together. "You can continue to be on the field but I can't allow you to go on chases. So if you do continue to go with the team in case, you can't go after the unsub unless it's running or you're in the passenger seat of a car" hotch explained. "This will need to go on file however. how long have you known?" He asked

"For 2 weeks but I think I've been pregnant for three as it takes a week for the test to actually pick up that you are" Spencer says, almost sobbing right there

Hotch let out a small sigh. "Have you gone to the doctor or anything since you found out?" Hotch asked. 

Spencer shook his head and looked at him. "I have one this week though" he says and looks at the floor. 

Morgan hugged Spencer. Right as Morgan hugged him, he began to sob. Rossi was still at the office and was talking to Garcia before walking past hotch's windows, it caught their attention but they'd ask later.

This was already having Garcia think about all the possibilities, Pregnancy being the last thing that she'd even consider. And why was Morgan there. Why were they hugging? She was trying to connect the dots but nothing fit

Hotch stood up, looking at them. He was trying to figure out what to do. Reid wasn't a touchy person and hotch understood that. 

"Reid, you can take as much time as you need off. I'm not forcing you to do anything and if you need time off right now you may take it" hotch says. 

Reid nodded and whipped his tears off his face. "Sorry- im- I wanna go home now"he says with a small sigh. He really wanted to go to sleep

Morgan nods and stops hugging him. "Now, I'm gonna take you home. Do you want me to stay the night or do you want me to go back to my house?" Morgan asked

Spencer thinks for a minute. "Stay the night, please" he says and looks at morgan.

Hotch just kinda stood there. He wasn't gonna interrupt as that would be rude but he still needed to do paper work.

After about another minute or two of talking to hotch and they were out of the office. No one asked questions but they sure were curious as to what was going on.

Morgan and Spencer went together whenever they came to Quantico so they would drive back home together.

As they drove home, it was a quiet ride. Spencer was thinking about things. "Morgan, what if something goes wrong?" Spencer asked.

Morgan leaned his head to the side. "Spencer if I remember correctly you have a 1 out of 33 chance of having a birth defect. You'll be okay. And if the baby does have a defect, we'll still love them because they're our bundle of joy" Morgan says with a smile as he parks in the apartment parking lot.


	3. I love you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yeah this shit isnt beta read at all and its also a filler chapter

It was 7am, Saturday morning. The blinds closed and the sky was grey. It was about to rain

Spencer was asleep on the couch as he just couldn't even stand up long enough to get to his bed. Morgan was on his bed anyway.

His brain made his dream do that fake falling shit and he woke up instantly. 

Spencer perked up as soon as he woke up. His stomach was twisting and turning. He felt like he was gonna be sick. Standing up immediately, he ran into the bathroom, pulling his hair back with his hands and throwing up. It wasn't a good day so far. He had fallen asleep at 4am so he had 3 hours of sleep.

Morgan was awake instantly as soon as he heard Spencer bolt into the bathroom. Hell it was actually pretty loud when he ran.

Morgan jumped up and ran into the bathroom. "Shit-are you okay?" Morgan asked before taking spencers hair and holding it for him

Spencer stopped throwing up and looked at him. "Y'know besides throwing up, I'm fine. How are you?"

Morgan chuckled a bit. "I'm pretty good but how about we get you cleaned up" he says with a smile

Spencer nodded, whipping off the vomit off his mouth with his arm. That made his entire body ache because that's a disgusting feeling for him. 

Standing up, he rushed to wash off his arm and was freaking out about the feeling. He hated it. 

Morgan looked at him, unsure of what to make of the situation but he wasn't gonna say shit as he understood. 

Spencer sighed and looked at Morgan. "I'm going right back to sleep after I shower and you should do the same but can you get my clothes please" Spencer says with a sigh. 

Morgan nodded and walked out, closing the door behind him and walking to reids room.

It took Reid a little longer to just even take off his clothes as he was slower and also way more tired. Hell he was on his first trimester and it takes a lot of hormones to even produce the placenta.

It took about 30 minutes for him to get in and out of the shower. "Hey-uh Morgan can you bring me my clothes please" he half yelled.

Morgan had his clothes already out and it was just something that Reid would in fact wear. A grey vest, blue button up shirt and whatever pants that Reid has. 

He got up and walked over to the bathroom, knocking before even opening the door because respect homie. 

"Open the door" Reid said with a small sigh. He was wrapped in a towel and was extremely self conscious at that moment. He felt extremely dysphoric and wanted to get his clothes on right then.

Morgan handed Reid his clothes and left the room, closing the bathroom door behind him. 

Reid quickly put on his clothes and just was trying to put on his clothes but his thoughts were overwhelming. 

He rather quickly started crying as he was buttoning his shirt up. He just needed to button up his shirt and put on his vest and he'd be fully dressed but he couldn't continue. 

Morgan knocked on the door. "You okay?"he asked.

Reid opened the door and hugged Morgan.Morgan stood there quietly, rubbing spencers back. "Tell me what's wrong baby boy" Morgan spoke quietly. 

"I feel dysphoric and I don't like seeing my body right now" Spencer mumbled. 

Morgan nodded. "you are a man and I know you are. I can't see you as a woman and your voice and your looks pass. You pass in the world as a Male and I didnt even know you were trans until you told me you were." Morgan says, speaking softly

"I love you"spencer says with a small smile 

"I love you too reid"


End file.
